It’s funny that I am getting some Anon questions now. I had to turn the Ask off at my main...
It’s funny that I am getting some Anon questions now. I had to turn the Ask off at my main fanblog because of all the inappropriate questions/messages I was getting. I opened it up here just for the PO Box thing for my bday tomorrow but the fact someone or some folk are asking me stuff has been kinda nice, mainly cuz I’ve been getting to do what I always dreamed of doing and answer in GIF form! I have so many GIFs I’ve made from my fave TV shows and now I get to use some! I know, stupid things geek me.
Today was supposed to be the day we had my “party.” I had told my mom I didn’t want one but when I asked earlier this week if everyone was coming today, she told me no because everyone had something else to do/couldn’t come and my feelings were/are way hurt lol :\ We’re supposed to do a combo Father’s Day/my bday celebration next week but … it’s never the same when it’s after the fact, is it?
What IS gonna go down today is my family is gonna go to the local theater to see Raiders of the Lost Ark on the big screen. When I went to see Fast 6 by my lonesome, I saw the ad for the Summer Classics and thought that’d be really cool to see as a real movie. Harrison Ford was such a dish in his “heyday!”
My family also wants to take me to Red Lobster since I’ve never had lobster before, but I dunno. I can’t seem to commit cuz spending that much money on a meal makes no sense to me, spesh right now. I’d rather spend the money on something we NEED and just go get my free birthday burger at Red Robin, haha.
My friend K who is checking the PO Box for me let me know 2 cards were in there when she checked it earlier this week. She said she is gonna try to check it again tomorrow. I also received an email from someone to inform me about something they sent that is apparently bigger than the PO Box? THAT worries me cuz y’all weren’t supposed to go to any trouble! Just a card or letter or something like that. But maybe the boxes are just really small and it’s a big card :) THANK YOU to anyone who sent something. I really appreciate it.
I’m debating being a super dork and going on Twitter and stating that the main reason I reactivated my Twitter was to beg everyone for birthday shoutouts cuz that’s what Twitter is for. I’d only be half kidding with that statement. I remember the days when me and my friends used to bug each others’ fave celebs for like a week prior to their big day, asking them to please just say hi and/or happy birthday. We were seldom successful and it was always a bummer when we weren’t, but I think we got lucky once or twice, and it was nice. I think bigger than my fear of looking like a jerk is nobody actually replying, haha. It’s sad, innit? The lengths we go to for validation, and how those lengths really are meaningless but we put so much stock in them. I mean, so what if nobody tweets me tomorrow? I’ve got a family that loves me and is celebrating me AND I’ve got beautiful people who have sent me messages and sent me snail mail! I have a big a$$ package from my bestie that I’m supposed to open before work tomorrow morning. I have to remember to set my alarm early!
See, but THIS is another reason I’m trying to rehabilitate myself. I need to re-train my brain and teach it to put emphasis and pay attention to what DOES count. I can’t be acting a fool and I don’t want to be acting a fool anymore. I don’t want to be the one people point at as the subject of a “and THAT is why we can’t have nice things” story, know what I mean? As it is, I feel myself on the verge of “calling people out” but why start drama? Well, because people don’t seem to have any common sense, humility, nor a clue of how their behavior reflects badly on entire groups and I, for one, don’t appreciate being given a “bad name” or handled with gloves because someone else doesn’t know how to “act like ya got some sense!” One bad apple spoils the whole darn bunch. *sigh* But I don’t feel like being cast as a villain either so … As always, I wish I knew how to care WAY LESS about things. Or maybe that others cared a little bit more.
It’s the start of a new week and I just really hope that it’s a good one and that things are coming up Milhouse for you! *HUGS* Thanks for coming around here and giving a damn about what’s going on. I appreciate you <3
Why do you hate Paul walker? Lol he's a little cutie surfer/actor. Like a guppy fish lol!
he's a little cutie surfer/actor. Like a guppy fish lol!
I don't hate Paul Walker. That's too strong an emotion, literally, but it's more than probable that I used that word in relation to the dude but if I did, I was being all "dramatical & sh*t" :P
And I don't know what a guppy fish is so I'm not sure what kind of comparison that is, haha. But when it comes to Paul Walker, there is just NOTHING going on there. For me, he is like a void; male version of Jessica Alba. I just…
I don't get it :P
The Love of My Life surprised me like this once. It was 3 of us...
The Love of My Life surprised me like this once. It was 3 of us and him, and he was having a conversation with the 1 dude amongst the 3 of us about golf. He loves (maybe "loved," it's been a while) golf. And I was awkwardly standing there, waiting for my turn to talk to him. It was odd cuz the dude he was talking to didn't KNOW the LoML liked golf til I had told him, and this came up in convo and the LoML paused in the convo to LOOK AT ME and I had to look at the floor! Ugh! But the dudes continued their convo and I stood there waiting to show the LoML a photo of him hugging me from a few years prior and stutter out "This again please?" As his convo with the other dude was ending, he and the other guy "dude hugged." They clapped hands, pulled each other in, slapped each other on the back, y'know? Dude Hug :) And then, with NO WARNING, as he was still saying something to the other dude, he just suddenly turned to me and wrapped his arms around me. O_O I couldn't breathe, I couldn't move, all I could feel was his arms around me and his chin on my right shoulder. He hugged me … WITHOUT ME ASKING. I wanted that moment to go on forever, but it was over in the blink of an eye. But oh my dear sweet goodness … by far, one of the Top 3 Happiest Moments of my entire life.
I miss him so much. *sigh*
Then there was this one time in Canada, I think in 2004/2005. I was at a concert with a former friend, The Used, and we were out at the merch tables after the show. I used to have a messenger bag and on the strap? TONS of buttons. I miss them. Anyways, one of them was Baby Eeyore and underneath him it said "I need a hug." Some random fellow concert goer read my button aloud and went, "Awe! You need a hug?" Then without hesitation, she came up to me and gave me a hug. A sincere, warm hug. I was FLABBERGASTED. That was honestly the first time I can remember that someone I didn't know did something for me like that. I came home from my trip going, "Canadians really are nicer than us!" :P
Funnily enough, the only other time I can think of that I received hugs I didn't ask for was at the AE Expo, haha. My gorgeous girl Tessa Lane gasped & smiled when she saw me, JUMPED out her seat, ran around the barrier and enveloped me in this HUGE, TIGHT hug. I was so shocked. I have NEVER felt more welcomed or wanted, y'know? It was like she had actually been waiting for me and wanted to see me; I'm not used to that feeling, at all. But Tessa has been really amazing to me beyond "the business" side of things, so for her to treat me like a real friend, as she had been treating me for a long time was just so amazing :) I love her!
And then, even more unexpected because I did NOT have any kind of relationship to him beyond "what I do," Mr. Michael Vegas. THAT DUDE? Oh my God. He should just travel around the world and give out hugs as a peace mission or something cuz I SWEAR! Again, I only knew Mr. V as a performer and someone I promoted from time to time or had random Twitter conversations with. So when I saw him at the bar and tapped him on the shoulder (cuz he had tweeted at me that I should go find him, or else I would NOT have gone to interrupt him on personal time), he turned around and I said to him, "You told me to come find you?" hoping he'd remember the tweet and before I knew it … BOOM. He had wrapped his arms around me and was hugging me SO TIGHTLY … I'm legit tearing up right now just thinking about it.
In my time meeting strangers, more often than not, when I have ASKED for hugs … the hugs I am given are given reluctantly and I know this because I get "spaghetti armed" or the other person holds their body away from me, quite awkwardly. JUST SAY NO if you don't wanna hug me! I sure as heck don't wanna be FORCING anyone into a hug! It's supposed to be an expression of affection! That is why I ask for a hug, because *I* want to expression MY affection & appreciation to someone but if they are uncomfortable, I would much rather them just say no then to "go through the motions" with me. Cuz I can TELL they don't wanna be a part of the hug and then I feel SO TERRIBLE.
So to have someone who was in essence, a stranger …. WRAP ME UP in his arms like I was a dear friend he had not seen in years and whom he had MISSED …. omg doesn't even cut it! I'm not sure if I told him afterwards that he "gives good hug" but I know we had a conversation about how, at a festival Mr. V frequents, they actually have a HUG DELI where people can go and "order" any type of hug they want. I find that fascinating and amazing and I hope to one day get to this HUG DELI.
I don't know why he hugged me like that other than Mr. V is an amazing human being with SO much affection in his heart for life and for people. But his willingness to be generous and do that? Impacted me greatly. I mean, here we are, 5 months later and I'm STILL talking about the hug he gave me! And it'll be the same in another 5 weeks, 5 months, 5 years. It was that meaningful to me and it's imprinted on my heart.
I'm insecure. This is a statement we can all make, I'm fairly certain, at one point or another in life. So I'm always hesitant around folk, especially new folk. I'm always afraid they won't like me as much in person as they do via virtual mediums. Or, if it's a strictly in person encounter, I do my best to hide under hats and hoods and whatever I can cuz I feel like my face is a deterrent. And that's just based on past experiences going up to strangers and having them look me up and down, then look at me disgusted (drummer of one of my former fave bands did that to me) or laugh in my face (guys at social gatherings) or just flat out ignore me like I'm not trying to talk to them (guys at social gatherings :P). And when someone gives me a half-ass hug? Well I always go in full force so that's like me going up to them and going "HI I REALLY LIKE YOU A LOT!!!!" and having them look at me awkwardly and go "Oh, uh, thanks, I guess" before slowly walking backwards and out of the situation. So when I am in a situation where I am treated so kindly and warmly? It means more than even all these words I've already typed up can ever say. And as you can see by the memories I'm conjuring up for y'all, it stays with me, and as someone with a memory like swiss cheese? That is a BIG DEAL.
What am I always telling you guys? THE SMALLEST GESTURE CAN MAKE THE BIGGEST DIFFERENCE. Y'all have NO IDEA how much an unexpected hug, a friendly smile, a sincere "How are you today?" can mean to someone. So try not to be afraid to offer it because, really? You never know who you might be bringing back from the edge with your kindness, or in whose life you are going to become a smile inducing memory for as long as they live :)
<3 you guys!
Weird question time lol. Favorite food to eat while watch Jc or Xavier? Lol I love cherry vanilla ice cream while watching JC lol
I hope you meant Xander, not Xavier. I of all folk know how my fingers can get away from me or, if you're on a cellie, how auto correct thinks she knows everything! But I'm worried you mighta meant this for someone else IF you did mean Xavier. But if you meant Xander and this question IS for me … well ….
When I watch porn, 90% of the time I'm too, uh, busy to be eating anything. I'm usually tucked under the covers and .. yeah. The other 9% of the time, I'm watching it to make screencaps or GIFs or to review it so I'm focused on that. Then the 1% of the time, I'm with my friend K and we're having Porn & Pizza Girls Night, in which case, we have pepperoni pizza & alcohol!
I think it's quite interesting you have a specific flavor for JC though :)
Should i be touching myself at work?
"I was being selfish. I'd love to tell myself I was being unselfish but I know, deep down in my..."
"I was being selfish. I'd love to tell myself I was being unselfish but I know, deep down in my primal sweet spot, I was being unselfish for selfish reasons. I just thought…my world would be a better place if you were in it."- Ned the Piemaker (Lee Pace) - Pushing Daisies
Isn't it odd how he can go from a tender cup of her cheek...
Isn't it odd how he can go from a tender cup of her cheek to wrapping his hand around her throat and you're STILL aroused, possibly even MORESO than you were before? And how much do you ENVY her for having the opportunity to wrap HER hand around HIS throat? AND SHE WENT FOR IT! Kudos, young lady, kudos.
Charismatic Enigma this one is.
And not for nothin but I MISS THAT HAIR! Thick & lush, you could just sink your fingers into it and really GRAB and PULL and …. yup. All that.
Co-Eds Are Easy from New Sensations is AVAILABLE NOW on certain VoD sites, like Adult DVD Empire.
These are dedicated to the precious JB, whom I lurve dearly. I know she's adjusting, as am I, and I apologize to her if she has felt neglected so I hope these make up for life's new turns. <33333
LmaoNot funny, Universe.Not funny :,(
Lmao
Not funny, Universe.
Not funny :,(
jillybean1217: -_-
-_-
langleav: Love & Misadventure by Lang Leav :(
Love & Misadventure by Lang Leav
:(
I am one of these people
I am one of these people
"Answering a tweet is like feeding a pigeon. Soon there are hundreds flapping around who want a crumb..."
"Answering a tweet is like feeding a pigeon. Soon there are hundreds flapping around who want a crumb :)"- Ricky Gervais
LAST CALL TO SEND ME SNAIL MAIL BEFORE NEXT MONDAY!
You know me. Ain’t too proud to beg for snail mail for my birthday next Monday :P It’s going to be a depressing occasion cuz not only does my bday fall on a Monday WITHOUT RUPAUL’S DRAG RACE OR CM PUNK to look forward to >:(
but I’ve also done fck all with the last year and I know myself and I’m gonna dwell. I’ve made no real impact on the world around me, on anyone’s life and I haven’t moved forward in my OWN life. I just … feel like a boob lol.
Unless I have awesome letters, stick figure drawings and/or cards to keep me busy. Honestly, it’d just be GREAT to get something other than bills and/or debt collection notices, y’know? And if you wanna eulogize (sp?) and send it? That’s ok too :P I know that might sound morbid to y’all but one of my FAVORITE MOVIES OF ALL TIME is Serendipity, and in that movie, the lead dude’s best friend can’t come up with a Best Man Speech so he ends up writing a eulogy for his buddy instead, and it’s actually quite moving. I dunno, I’m weird lol!
So if you have a Tumblr, be sure you’re signed in and message me and I can send you the address of the PO Box I have access to til the end of the month OR drop me an email at johnnycastlefan at gmail dot com and I can email you back with the addy too.
THANK YOU to anyone who sends something. My bestie has already sent me 2 cards. I got one on Monday and then one again on Tuesday and I FELT SO SPOILED!!! But it was awesome and overwhelming that someone took the time and thoughtfulness to do that for me. I am undeserving but so grateful, bestie ‘o mine <3
Do you read romance novels?
By the box full! Well, I used to. I haven't read a book in forever but I still have boxes full of Harlequin and Silhouette books. They are how I learned about sex! I was reading Sherrilyn Kenyon's Dark Hunter series a few years ago before I stopped reading. I know those aren't strictly romance but ohmyGAWD, are they delicious!
TODAY on Naughty America at 2:30 PST, there'll be a LIVE...
TODAY on Naughty America at 2:30 PST, there'll be a LIVE SEX SHOW starring the incomparable India Summer & charming Logan Pierce! You definitely don't want to miss it, so be sure to SIGN UP TO NAUGHTY AMERICA to see the show FREE as a member OR check out THEIR STREAMATE PAGE so you can pay for the show this afternoon :)
BRILLIANT & oh-so-fitting graphic made by jillybean1217 with...
BRILLIANT & oh-so-fitting graphic made by jillybean1217 with photos by Mr. Michael Vegas himself
Mr. Vegas … so much to say and no proper words to say any of it, really. I honestly just wish I was where you were today for even 2 minutes so I could give you a strong, sincere, lingering 30 seconds past comfortable hug. That hug would be an expression of my gratitude to you for everything that you are :)
You are such a unique spirit. I honestly have not come across anyone like you. You are so full of happiness and affection, and that affection is not just for the people you hold dear, but for all of humanity. Even people who come at you rudely who don't necessarily deserve your respect … you don't begrudge anyone, even those people.
If hope had a face? Well, I'll just say that since meeting you, Hope is a he and right now, is the very picture of mustachioed magnificence ;)
Doesn't matter if you're sharing some of your amazing photos, performing in a scene or spinning poi … you fascinate & delight me. You're one of the few people I've come across in my life that if I see your name or face, I just have to smile. You inspire joy in my heart just by being you.
For that, and so much more, I am very grateful, most especially for that huge hug you gave me when I had the pleasure of meeting you. You treated me as though we were besties who hadn't seen each other in a long while. You quite literally took my breath away with your huge gesture of kindness; on particularly rough days, I actually think back on that hug. I close my eyes and I remember how warmly you welcomed me and how tightly you held me, like you really cared & were happy to see me :) I wipe away my tears and feel a little bit of my strength renewed because it was such a lovely & powerful act of kindness on your part, truly. And if someone like you is out there … the world can't be the terrible place it seems sometimes.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MR. VEGAS! May this year bring you all that your heart desires and be your best year yet. THANK YOU <3
Me: People suck
Me: People suckBestie: I don't! But I would if SOMEBODY asked me to.
-_- That "somebody" is Xander Corvus & my bestie is a dumbass :P BUT I LOVE HER!
Photo
I swear to GAWD, that's Xander. And that's Lexi...
I swear to GAWD, that's Xander. And that's Lexi Belle for sure but I don't know this scene so I'm annoyed >:( lol
ETA: OHMYGAWD, I DID KNOW THIS SCENE! I just buried it in the back of my mind cuz it's from Saturday Night Fever XXX and that's the FIRST time Xander made me CRY with his acting :'( UGH. And she practically FORCES HIM to have sex in this scene (his character didn't want to cuz she wasn't on protection & he didn't wanna get her preggers)!
Of course, JB to the rescue! Thank you for helping me unrepress this memory :P And to the anon who wrote in to confirm my suspicion.
Every guy I've ever had feelings for lol
Every guy I've ever had feelings for lol
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